Fighters' Kombat: Round 1 & Fatality!

"When fists fly, dimensions collide!" 

RUMORED Plot Summary:**  

When a dimensional rift merges the worlds of Street Fighter and Mortal Kombat, Earthrealm’s warriors and Shadaloo’s villains unite for a chaotic tournament. Former UFC champions, cast as iconic fighters, must navigate absurd rules, clashing egos, and comedic chaos to stop Outworld dictator Shang Tsung (played by Jackie Chan) and M. Bison (Dana White) from conquering all realms.  

Cast & Characters:  

Luke Rockhold as Johnny Cage (Mortal Kombat): A cocky actor-fighter obsessed with selfies and trash talk. His "Shadow Kick" is just him throwing a shoe.  

Ronda Rousey as E. Ronda (Street Fighter II): A no-nonsense soldier who armbars villains while ranting about "Do Nothing Bitches" in the bathhouse.  

Khabib Nurmagomedov as Zangief's lil bro (Street Fighter II): Wrestles bears for fun everyday in between sessions of working and studying.

Israel Adesanya as Chun-Li's obsessed stalker (StreetFighter II): Spinning Bird Kicks enemies while snacking on açai bowls and confusing his own identity as the real Chun-Li.

Lyoto Machida as Ryu (Street Fighter II): A zen Hadouken master confused by everyone’s immaturity.  

Brock Lesnar as Goro (Mortal Kombat): A four-armed behemoth who’s just a sensitive guy obsessed with skincare.  

Rampage Jackson as Balrog (Street Fighter II): A boxing champion who forgets his lines and shocks himself by accident.  

Jon Jones does his best Dhalsim impression.

Jon Jones as Dhalsim (Street Fighter II): As a master of Yoga Fighting, he can hit you with any of his limbs from a long distance...including his c*ck (because of his infamous dick pills)

Key Scenes:  

1. Portal Problems: Johnny Cage (Rockhold) and Ryu (Lyoto Machida, in a cameo) argue over whose theme music is better, only to be interrupted by a dance-off challenge from Outworld.  

2. Training Montage: The heroes "train" via TikTok dances, yoga, and a Rocky-style sprint past confused tourists.  

3. Projectile Spam: Ken (Stephen "Wonderboy" Thompson) accidentally shoots a Hadouken fireball at a buffet, yelling, “Oops, wrong button!”  

4. Fatality Fail: Scorpion (Jim Carrey) attempts a fatality but accidentally tickles Goro (Lesnar) into submission.  

5. Final Showdown: The UFC crew defeats Shang Tsung by challenging him to a rap battle, with Raiden dropping sick beats.  

Humor & Easter Eggs:

Meta Jokes: Sonya Blade (Holly Holm) rolls her eyes at "macho one-liners," while Liu Kang (GSP with a wig on) tries to mediate with Canadian politeness.  

Game Mechanics: Health bars appear overhead; fighters complain about "cheap AI" when zapped by Raiden.  

Post-Credits Scene: Rockhold’s Johnny Cage pitches Fighters' Kombat 2 to a bored Hollywood exec.  

Verdict: A riotous mashup of ’90s nostalgia and UFC bravado, packed with slapstick, inside jokes, and a heartwarming message: “Friendship” still wins… but only after a flaming uppercut.